Fear of Mistakes
From this post on, we’re going to look at the reasons behind procrastination, and we’re starting with the obvious:
Fear of doing something wrong.
Now, rationally, we know that making an error isn’t a big thing, it’s usually a moment where we can learn something or grow a little. That’s the adult way of looking at mistakes.
Emotionally, we’ve been drilled to live in fear of mistakes.
It starts in school. Every error is marked in red, and it costs us. Points. Grades. Love from the teacher. No smilies. No happy faces. Disgrace.
Maybe we even got laughed at.
So emotionally, we fear making a mistake.
And depending on the cost of the mistake, we are reluctant to do a task.
Which means that we’re more reluctant and likely to procrastinate more on a tax declaration than on cleaning the bathroom, in general.
And if we’re worried about getting a difficult chapter or scene right, that can totally stop us in our tracks.
It’s the fear!
The problem is that when we’re filled with fear – even if it’s a complete irrational fear originating from the time we were six years old – we can’t think very well.
Our main brain goes offline when we’re stressed, and our thinking reverts to what I like to call our reptile brain. And the focus is on fight, flight or playing dead.
Since we can’t really fight a tax declaration or that bed scene, our usual options are flight (cleaning the bathroom) or playing dead.
The solution is releasing the stress.
What we need to do is to release stress – to get our brain back online. With our mighty brain, we can solve the tricky scene, and we can work our way through the mysterious language of a tax declaration.
And if you were my client, we’d dig deeper into those school memories and shift the origins of that fear. Alas, this is so individual I can’t quite do it for you guys reading this.
What you can do is to tap a little more generally, to release stress and some of that fear. And with a bit of luck, you’ll see quite a shift even this way.
Here’s some tapping for you.
Tapping phrases
Even though I procrastinate on things because of this vague underlying fear, I’m totally okay the way I am, and I’m now open to releasing both the stress and the fear.
Even though I worry about mistakes and that makes me procrastinate on tasks or writing, I’m totally okay the way I am, and I now choose to know that this might be an ancient fear that I can let go.
Even though I worry about mistakes, and that stops me cold from writing a difficult chapter or doing an important task, I’m totally okay the way I am, and I now choose to give myself permission to do these tasks without fear.
Asking you:
How do you feel about making mistakes?
Do you have a gut reaction?
What happened while you were tapping?
And finally – will you keep writing?
Please share in a comment.
Image Source: F. Moebius
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